The Plan

The Plan

In the beginning was The Plan.

And then came The Assumptions.

And The Assumptions were without form.

And The Plan was without substance.

And darkness was upon the faces of the workers.

And they spoke among themselves, saying "It is a crock of shit, and it stinks."

And the workers went unto their supervisors and said loudly: "It is a bucket of dung, and we cannot live with the smell."

Whereupon the supervisors went to their managers and said: "It is a container of excrement, and it's so strong, that none may abide by it."

The managers went quickly up into the temple and seeking the directors of the company, went unto them, saying in pious voices: "It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."

After much feasting and vulgar partying, the directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another: "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."

And together the directors went up to the hill looking for the Vice President. They said gravely: "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

Seizing upon this information the Vice President, went unto the President, saying: "This new Plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the company with very powerful effects."

The President looked upon The Plan and saw that it was good.

And The Plan became Policy.

AND THIS IS HOW SHIT HAPPENS